Wednesday, June 21, 2017

Wanting To Throw In The Towel

For the first time since a hard workout during Ironman Lake Placid last year I cried my way through swim practice. Between my body recovering from Rev3 Montclair Triathlon and having NO swim buddies my speed; I cried because I wanted to throw in the towel and give up on swimming and coaching. While I was swimming; I formulated an email in my head to send to Heather to just give up on the coaching completely. Unfortunately; I ended up writing an email to her explaining my depression and anxiety and how it sometimes speaks too loud in my mind and tells me to give in. But thankfully right after I wrote the email I talked to my friend Julie who I swim with and do triathlons with; then deciding to write another email to Heather to disregard the first email. Honestly I feel like an idiot and hope all is still well.
The workout itself wasn’t terribly bad. I swam as hard as I could; making ALL the 50s in under 48 seconds and ALL the 100s in under 1 min 40 seconds. So basically I succeeded even though my body ached. I also did 3000 in under 1 hour and 15 minutes, which is pretty good. Even though it’s just the start of training with Heather; I’m learning a lot, which is one of my goals throughout this. Today I have a bike ride with a 20 minute time trial as the main set. Onward to Ironman 70.3 Atlantic City

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